Wednesday, 23 January 2013

Ferocious Fours

We have hit some big milestones with our oldest boy turning four this month. 

He finally gave up his beloved papaz (pacifier) by throwing his last remaining broken one into the trash, saying, "bye bye papaz" and that was the last of it. (Apart for a few random requests now and then that are easily squashed / forgotten). 

He also mastered all his potty business, day and night and now we're down to one diaper a day for Elena (at night - although she is pretty much ready to get rid of that one too). 

He gave up his daily nap (much to mommy's dismay).

I had this all ready for his birth story post - was just waiting on the 4 years old shot! My how time flies. 
Now we are dealing with the "ferocious fours". 

fe·ro·cious - extreme or intense.

Every emotion he feels is to the extreme! He was so excited about his construction themed party that he prayed about it for a few days before the party. We also get the intense frustration when he can't do things all on his own, when mommy decides something needs to stop, or we need to go do another activity. This feels like the most difficult time we've have with him in terms of discipline. (Of course, this is probably because we are in the middle of it right. now. With another child. And a pregnant/sick/exhausted mommy.) He is learning to express the whole range of emotions and we are trying to teach him how to deal with anger and sadness in appropriate ways.

I think most "stages" of parenting can feel like the worst when you are going through them. I certainly remember feeling extremely overwhelmed in the first few weeks of Lucas' life. Now I look back and wish I had let him sleep on my chest more, rocked him in the chair more and cherished that season (as crazy and sleep-deprived as it was). 

When you are in the thick of the "ones" they can often be the Worrisome Ones. Is my child developing on schedule? Will he ever start talking? Could he please eat more fruit than just bananas? Why won't he sleep through the night? Of course once you hit the twos - the ones start to look more like the Wonderful Ones!

The Terrible Twos turn into Terrific Twos when you hit the Traumatic Threes.

The Traumatic Threes turn into Thrilling Threes when you hit the Ferocious Fours.

Now, don't think that it just gets worse with every passing year. It's just different. New challenges to keep you on your toes. And with new challenges, come new blessings and fresh developments that make your relationship with your child so much deeper and stronger. The learning curve is pretty steep in motherhood - and we're never going to stop learning. So we stick through it knowing that when we look back we will see the foundations that were put in place through laughter, tears, sleepless nights and long days. We will remember 80% of the good things and probably only 10% of the bad things. 

So if you feel like you're in a really bad/hard/challenging stage of parenting, don't give up. It will get better. (And then worse, and then better again, but that's not really the point.) It is all part of the journey, yours as a mother, and your childs. Embrace it. 

Even when it feels like you can't make it to bedtime.   


3 comments:

  1. We just hit the fours too---somedays it takes all the patience in the world to make it through the day, right?!?! Glad someone else is having these moments and I do know it won't last forever, right?!

    Julie
    www.thechirpingmoms.com

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  2. Great perspective, Taara. I suppose right now I'm in the "when will my baby talk?" stage, but to be honest, I'm not too anxious about it. Love your positive spins on the ages: "terrific twos" and "thrilling threes." I'll have to keep that in my vocabulary, as SO many people here keep warning us about "twos." Thanks for linking up with the mommy-brain mixer this week. It's always a pleasure to read your work. Hoping your pregnancy's going great!

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